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Sunday, February 04, 2007

What is NOT cool at the pool

The eternal question when it comes to men's swimming apparel: Budgie Smugglers (or "Speedos" as they're more internationally known) or Board Shorts?

Most women opt for the latter, I believe. Frankly, I'm indifferent. Men as a whole generally look less like Keanu Reeves and whole lot more like Gary Busey when stripped down to the basics and a pair of pants really doesn't make much of a difference. (I'd even guess women would agree they are the same; except insert the names of, oh, Eva Longoria and Dame Edna Everage instead).



Today we were at the pool. Being over thirty degrees it was, naturally, packed out. As usual, I preferred to watch from the sidelines (I hadn't shaved) and I could not help but notice there was a gentleman there wearing bright red speedos. Wow, I remember thinking. That's brave.
Then ten minutes later I saw the same man, same speedos, wet.
I did not know where to look. They'd gone completely see-through. I could see everything. My eyes watered (but that could've been from the chlorine fumes). I even choked a little (but that could've been from the chlorine fumes). This man was with his children and if I'd've been his kid I would've been mortified at the dress malfunction.



He was having a great time. He was playing and running around. He probably didn't even know. So I feel like a snippy cow sitting here relating this story when there are other things I could talk about.



What do you think? If you were in my position what would you been thinking right now?

Comments on "What is NOT cool at the pool"


Blogger Tracey said ... (9:47 am) : 

My other half usually only wears speedos because he can't stand to bodysurf with wet flapping boardies - and I can't say I blame him. I couldn't stand to swim with knee length loose pants. I know all the young dudes do it, but I don't understand it! It's bad enough wearing a rash shirt IMHO. That said, we usually only swim at our beach which hardly has anyone around... so even I can walk down to the water from the towels in my one-piece without feeling excruciatingly embarrassed. Which I feel if there are people around.

He does have a pair of boardie type shorts which he wears to crowded places - on the rare occasions we are at somewhere like a public pool. And they're black and not transparent. And he doesn't "cavort" around in them. And I figure if they're not transparent, and close fitting enough to 'hold it all in', then why shouldn't guys wear them? Is there then any difference to them and women wearing bikinis? (Or G-strings?)

He did read something recently (one of those Modern Guru letters in The Good Weekend) about the same thing, and he got a bit peturbed - asked me if I thought he was 'scarring our kids for life'.

I told him I reckoned he was safe on our beach at any rate - and we are just fortunate that we don't have to swim with crowds.

And he seems to be able to wear his more 'demurely' than some guys. He's also not put on the weight that a lot of his peers have done with age, and so he has nothing to be ashamed about with the rest of his bod in speedos.


Blogger shishyboo said ... (1:36 pm) : 

I just asked my hubby who is a pool op manager how the situation would be handled at his pool ...

He says they reserve the right to refuse entry if someone doesn't have approriate bathing attire, which includes see through bathers, g-strings, ridiculously baggy shorts (not boardies).

I'm guessing (hoping) this guy didn't realise the situation and hopefully someone might tactfully point it out to him so it doesn't happen again.


Blogger strauss said ... (1:45 pm) : 

Bathers, mens or women's are perhaps teh most God awful odious garments known to mankind. Rarely does a person look good in them.
I don't like the speedo look myself and god forbid they turn out to be see through when wet, what cruel manufacturer went and did that. I understand what you are saying about the comfort thing Tracey, but Speedos rarely look right on any guy over the age of 7. As for g-string bathers, or the baboon butt look ewwww. Perhaps it is because I am not endowed with a great figure and so I feel terribly self-conscious in bathers, but really, should anyone have the guts to wear bathers publicly - well good on them.


Blogger scribbit said ... (4:25 pm) : 

The horror! The horror! Speedos should be outlawed. You're lucky your retinas weren't burned beyond repair at the sight. :)



Blogger Miscellaneous-Mum said ... (4:56 pm) : 

shishyboo - that is pretty interesting re: right to refuse access. Makes sense. Also makes me wonder how often that right gets to be excercised!

Scribbit - oh, the memory will be with me for a while *shudder*


Blogger shishyboo said ... (10:13 pm) : 

I guess it's up to the manager's disgression whether to implement this particular policy but I would think in the case of see through speedos if staff haven't spotted it and another patron of the pool makes a complaint then the manager would deal with it.

My hubby hasn't had to deal with anyone in similar see through circumstances but he has sent plenty of boys home to change out of 3/4 length thick canvas (or similar) shorts that only cover half their butts.

Speedos don't generally bother me, I reckon we're all at our most vulnerable in our bathers and nobody looks that great. But I do take exception to see through bathers, particularly if they're worn in a public & family oriented place.

Steering off the track though, I do like the "bathers, bathers, bathers....UNDIES" ad on tv hehehe


Blogger shishyboo said ... (11:34 pm) : 

sorry by disgression I meant discretion, what a wally


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