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Wednesday, March 21, 2007

....Just taking a moment........

I am quite upset. This will not do my mental health much good, but I'm going to talk about this in a brief, rational way, even if my insides are churning with disgust.

I am also going to be deliberately vague, but you'll be able to piece the story together.

When our family is sick we go to a local clinic, where about a half dozen doctors practice together. Just like anywhere in the world. Then I open the paper today to discover one of these doctor's (NOT my favourite, trusted one, thank the Lord) has been charged with sexual offences. These include, but I do not know if are limited to, minors. These apparently date back over the past forty years.

I have been to this doctor once or twice, but did not really 'gel' with him. I would only go to him as a last resort. Neither of the kids have ever seen him.

I rang the clinic immediately to have the news confirmed, perhaps 'if' there were two doctors of this name in the area. Alas, no.

Again, I am rocked by fear and knee-jerk paranoia. Now, as in other periods in my life, I'll be thinking twice about anybody who comes up to me, wondering what their agenda 'might' be. Yes, of course, this feeling does pass after a few hours/day. This is just my hyper-sensitivity (or 'anxiety', as my doctor would say) running riot.

People wonder why I don't leave my kids (very often) with others, not even in day-care. I would love to, LOVE to, but shit ('scuse language) like this happens and I feel like holing myself up in the house and barring the doors.

There is no 'appropriate' response to this, I guess. I am wondering though -- how would YOU react if you were in a similar position to mine?

Comments on "....Just taking a moment........"

 

Anonymous Rav`N said ... (1:42 pm) : 

Its really sickening to hear stories of how people abuse their positions like that. Only in the last week or two we had a case of a vet that has been charged with pedophillia. he was selling drugs to minors, but not for money. I can't even begin to comprehend the thought processes of people like these two men.

 

Blogger JR's Thumbprints said ... (3:03 pm) : 

You have every right to be paranoid. I work in a prison in the United States. I deal with pedophiles on a daily basis. They may look normal, but believe me, they are very dangerous around children.

 

Blogger Jamie said ... (4:08 pm) : 

I often wonder about taking Delaney and moving to a mid-sized houseboat off the coast of Alaska for the next 20 years.

You are not alone in your overwhelming paranoia. It is paralyzing sometimes.

I am a fan of talking openly with your kids when they are old enough to understand. My Mom always did with me (I used to make fun of her for being so paranoid but I always remembered everything she told me).

Hopefully next time you visit the clinic, you can find the accused Doc and kick him in the nuts once or twice. That may relieve some of the frustration.....


Jamie

 

Blogger shishyboo said ... (4:17 pm) : 

this is a very frightening thing to have happen.

i don't know exactly how i would react in the same position, my guess is my gut instincts would kick in like yours.

 

Blogger Shelly Kneupper Tucker said ... (7:04 pm) : 

I would probably have a bit of the same fear, but would feel overwhelming relief that it had not happened to me or mine. My children are grown now, but I know it was always a puzzle to me to determine the fine line between teaching children to be "cautious" and teaching them "distrust." It's awful that there are people like that doctor in this world. But, we have to remember that there are people who are inherently good, too. I guess we have to watch that "Richter scale of sensitivity." You have a delicious blog!

 

Blogger FRIDAY'S CHILD said ... (8:51 pm) : 

That is really disgusting. I think I would react the same way you did.
Thanks for passing by.

 

Blogger strauss said ... (2:52 am) : 

You have every right to be upset - that is gross.
I have similar concerns about placing my kids in the care of others, which is a shame. I am very paranoid about strangers with my kids. For some reason, my little girl gets an enormous lot of attention from elderly people. It is a bit of a worry - some of them really get in her face.
20 years ago, my priest was changed with molesting teen girls. It was interesting because straight after church my brotehr and I would run to the car and lock ourselves in until our parents wanted to go home - that guy gave us the creeps. And while it didn't exactly surprise me when his face was splashed all over teh nightly news, the sense of betrayal and lost trust was really quite overwhelming. I have a strong spiritual faith, but that experience really affected my trust in religious institutions and their programs. Sorry if my comment offends anyone, but that is what the actions of such people do- they taint the good out there and put a dent in peoples trust.

 

Blogger Jamie said ... (2:56 am) : 

You have every right to be angry that this man was apparently protected by his associates for over 40 years. OTOH, don't let one incident color the way you approach life.

In modern society where we no longer live in small towns where everyone knew who the bad guys were, it is a little harder to avoid them, but the percentages remain the same ...

10% bad, 80% good for the most part, 10% saints. Just keep your antenna in working order while trusting the majority of people.

 

Blogger Barbara said ... (3:30 pm) : 

I believe I'd react the same way.

My daughter and I were talking about these sort of things just today. She has a teenage daughter and son (JR & SR in HS)in Florida with friends on Spring break. She has always made it a habit to talk with her kids and make it easy for them to talk with her about any and everything! Some people can't understand that - even other kids say they can talk to her when they can't even talk to their parents.

But, today, she said she was appalled at how some young people can talk in school about things we never talked about until being married. They feel no fear about anything - they are indispensable, or so they think. And, so, she wants her kids (she has 4) to know about things and how to protect themselves from such as this - and never be afraid to come to her with anything. And, they have always done that. They tell their friends they can talk to Mom about anything.

 

Blogger Miscellaneous-Mum said ... (3:45 pm) : 

Thanks everybody. Thanks for your kind words.

I will have to try and remember jamie's words - 10% bad. Let's hope I'm no where near those. Scary thing is, who can tell?

 

Blogger Miscellaneous-Mum said ... (3:45 pm) : 

Thanks everybody. Thanks for your kind words.

I will have to try and remember jamie's words - 10% bad. Let's hope I'm no where near those. Scary thing is, who can tell?

 

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