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Friday, March 30, 2007

My life is a Jim Steinman song

Every now and then I get a little bit lonely*......

Riley is sick this week and we've been sequestered in the house, venturing out only to the chemist or the mail box.

Every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears...

Well, his tears, as he's crying 50% of the time he's awake. The other 50% he's on the breast.

Every now and then I get a little bit angry and I know I've got to get out and cry...

On Sunday, I had the house in a pristine state. By Tuesday morning it looked like London during the blitz and nothing, nothing I tried to do could fix it. I've had no sleep. Excess caffeine is making me ill, but it's the only thing making me operate. I'm eating six sandwiches in a sitting, I'm so hungry from all of Riley's breastfeeding. "It has to stop soon" I say to myself, and then I want to weep because I'm not sure I'm ready.

Then I see Keira staring at us from the couch with reproachful eyes, and I know she's suffering too, from Riley's constant irritability.

Every now and then I know you'll always be the only boy who wanted me the way that I am...

Yet for all my frustration, his cries move me. He scrabbles for my legs and will not let go. His angry gums radiate pain; he is a bundle of raw nerves. His fever burns my skin; I can barely imagine how he feels. He doesn't want me to; he just wants to be held.

Every now and then I know there's no one in the universe as magical and wondrous as you ....

My poor, beautiful boy. Get better soon. Please.

Every now and then I know there's nothing any better and there's nothing I just wouldn't do ...

Amen Bonnie. Sing it to me loud. You'll have to at the moment: who needs a wind machine in this house when you've got Riley passing it straight from a Dantean circle of hell?

*Total Eclipse of the Heart, Jim Steinman. The man knows how to write a power ballad.

Edited to add: I wrote this two days ago. We turned a corner yesterday afternoon and he is happier now. Well, at least he slept better through the night, which is always a good sign.

Comments on "My life is a Jim Steinman song"


Blogger crissybug said ... (9:25 am) : 

I feel for you! My little boy started throwing up today. It is so not fun to have sick children!


Blogger gingajoy said ... (12:33 pm) : 

I am so glad he;s doing better. We've been there also several times this last few weeks. ust awful....

Nothing more heartbreaking than a wee sick one.


Anonymous Izzy said ... (2:22 pm) : 

I'm glad your lil guy is doing better. It's hard when they're sick.

I was reading those lyrics and I'm all "Hey! I KNOW that song!"

I haven't thought about it OR Bonnie Tyler in ages but I happened to have seen her last night on some show on VH-1.


Blogger Babystepper said ... (2:28 am) : 

I think Dante could have added a circle in The Inferno. It would be listening to the cries of someone you love, but being unable to help them. I don't know who particularly would be punished in this way, but it would have to be something pretty serious, because I can't think of much worse than that. I think all of us Mommies feel your pain. Or have, anyway. Glad he's doing a bit better.


Blogger Oh, The Joys said ... (3:23 am) : 

Glad to hear he's feeling better!


Blogger Miscellaneous-Mum said ... (6:29 pm) : 

Oh thank you ladies. So sweet of you to say :)


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