Keira would not be impressed if I was a celebrity

The other week, for a laugh, I put on the "Temptation" episode on which I appeared, on the video, to see what Keira would think. At first, she was unsure why the techno-colours of Hi-5, or much more agreeable ABC themes, were not playing. Then, when she saw humble ole' me come up onto the screen, her face went blank. No smiles. No excitement (luckily, Riley filled in there with coos of recognition). No anticipation of what was to come. No - instead I got a withering, disgruntled look. I could read it instantly: "Jesus Christ, now you've invaded my favourite form of media? Can I get no rest from you? Get off my screen! Get off!" Honey, that's how the rest of Australia feels about Eddie McGuire. And possibly Paris Hilton.